Sometimes life events cause the body, soul, and mind to ache beyond description. This experience can be best understood when loss has been experienced.
In order to heal and reduce the aching, it is requisite to go into that space repeatedly. In other words, embracing the ache.
Embracing the ache sucks, but when it subsides it's possible to realize just how much healing has occurred.
It's sometimes a surreal feeling; to transition from feeling that it's almost too painful to even breathe to then turn some invisible corner and find peaceful acceptance.
I have been experiencing this over the last few months. It feels almost as if I've been living in a blur; a very painful to breathe kind of blur.
During this time it has been comforting to have memories of good times. The thrill of a run or simply talking about memories with close friends and family. A good nights sleep that wasn't interrupted by tears.
I couldn't write for a time, because I felt blocked. I feel a little more free now. My heart isn't as heavy. I still miss those that have passed away very much, chiefly my sister from this last May.
I have been listening to some of her favorite music and that has been a tremendous connection and healer.