Log off. Do the thing that's next on your "To Do" list that you've been putting off for ... forever. Do the thing that you've said, "someday I'm going to..." Do something different than your default activity. Press the off button on anything around you that has the on button currently engaged.
As I have been becoming adjusted to the life of a mother, so many things have taken on new meaning and have brought a heightened level of understanding. Such as the modern day drive-through window. Goodnight! What used to be a five minute errand has now become 20-30, if things are running smoothly with a babe in tow. This is not a complaint, rather a realization made public. I can understand how a tired parent would find it easier to hit a fast food restaurant, using the drive-through window, rather than going home to cook a meal. It really doesn't save time at all, but if you are already out and about, it certainly saves on energy devoted to feeding the crew. It also makes more sense why I see minivans pull into a fast food window or quick stop coffee shop, just to get a thirty-two ounce soda or daily coffee. The time and hassle of getting in and out of the car with a car seat or child is too much just to get a simple fix of caffeine. I have found myself deliberating the term is "is it worth it?" It sure makes things more visible, if you still have a lingering addiction(s). It also brings to light how ingrained old habits are which have long since been broken... they start to creep back in. Some may think that I am over-thinking this or putting too much pressure on myself, but I don't think that at all. I think I am absolutely worth the effort of questioning this, rather than blindly following convenience and socially accepted norms. An occasional stop, wherein I struggle to make the healthiest selection possible is one thing, but more than, say, twice a month... I'm not happy with that. So the question is, do I condescend to a quick food stop, for sake of sanity and ease but then lose total nutrition? Especially while in the same stop I'm also training my kid(s) into this kind of habit? I'm asking myself this question now, because the answer is incredibly important to me. I need to make the decision now - not on the go. It may be more difficult to wait a few minutes with an already hungry family to make a better, lower-fat, sugar-reduced or non-fried meal. It may be more inconvenient in the short term, but certainly less so in the long term. I'm interested in reducing physical and health-based consequences, not creating them. Is this unrealistic? Only to those that haven't made it a priority to care enough to actually change their behavior. Oops! I said it and may have offended someone, but if I did, then good - it hit home. I absolutely refuse to turn around ten years from now and look back to see that it was during this time that I could have committed to not embrace a drive-through life, especially when there were better options and better habits to step into. Regardless of the direction, it requires practice. My practice is currently outlined. It is to start: 1) making and packing lunches if I'm headed out for the day - I've got a cooler and ice packs - they will be used; 2) driving home, not "through"; 3) prepare a healthy snack bag to have on hand.
Here's a good example of how the meaning of a work can be interpreted differently, based on experience. Today, I am hot and frustrated because... for one brief moment I came out of alignment with the universe and have a bad attitude about nothing in particular. I'm thirsty, and for some reason, I am craving all the things that I have already decided are not good for me. I am, in a sense, a prickly person inside. So here is a work I penned while exploring Carlsbad, New Mexico; a very beautiful place by the way.
Byron Katie is an amazing woman who has such a simple concept she teaches and the simple concept is quite literally mind blowing. She's going to be presenting at the Salt Lake City Downtown Radisson on September 22; who's coming with me?
Participating in this one day event can quite literally change your life. It has the power to strip you of negative perceptions and help you write new very positive ones.
Byron Katie has one job: to teach people how to end their own suffering. As she guides people through her simple yet powerful process of inquiry, called The Work, they find again and again that their stressful beliefs—about the world, other people, or themselves—can no longer run their lives. Join Katie in a workshop designed to take you on this one-of-a-kind journey of self-discovery now.
A manifesto is a public declaration of intentions. You may
have just been turned off with the word “public” and feel the desire to shy
away from reading any further. hBefore you leave, though, try to look at it this way – public
simply means, written and visible. If you happen to share it with anyone
else, well then that’s your prerogative. A manifesto is a very good way to get the concepts of where
you’ve come from and where you intend to go out in front of you. In doing
so, you’ve just taken something undefined and made it tangible, in order to
cultivate an incredible tool to plot out your future intentions – to make the
future less uncertain, and instead more purposeful. Manifestos can be
professional, business or personal declarations of purpose. I believe that a
personal manifesto is an incredibly powerful tool to rewrite your present, your
future and to cultivate a stronger better you.
In order to create your manifesto you need a specific topic.
I really like using Jeff Goins’, The Writer’s Manifesto as
a good example. This is completely focused on how to write unfettered and a way
to stop being your own stumbling block. However, here are few more famous
manifestos that you may have heard of:
Declaration of Independence
Luther King’s “I Have a Dream” speech
Now how do you write
I really like how clear and concise Geoff McDonald has
outlined the tools for this activity. I’ll make a quick summary here:
What do you intend to achieve in writing your manifesto? What’s the end goal?
Be straight up and bold, say it how it is.
ØPublic: You can take this to any level you want to. Share with yourself by making
it visible to you daily; share with your spouse, partner, family; this could be
a business effort. However public you make this is up to you, however it needs
to be visible. Why? Accountability.
what you intend to achieve.
or enhance a better future.
To Restate and To
Keep In Mind
Have a specific manifesto topic in mind.
Be real. Your manifesto is as powerful as you are honest.
Manifestos can evolve as you do.
Keep your ethics and your standards in mind always.
Be willing to articulate what has colored your
perspective(s), without pointing blame.
It is what it is; you must know this in order to move beyond
who you currently are.
How can you be truly self reliant, loving... everything you
wish you were when you can't stand yourself?
If you're not at that point, but you've lost an edge somehow,
what do you do so you don't keep sliding backwards and
away from who you are wanting to be?
These things happen when you lose or don't know what your
"why" is. Why do you eat what you eat, do what you do, comb
your hair or cut it a certain way? Why do you seem to always wear a certain color, why do you achieve big things and then always slide backwards? Why do you believe the way you do, why do you say certain phrases, why are you negative, why are you positive, why do you yell or get frustrated when people question you, why do you get defensive so quickly, why are you so optimistic?
In short, I believe this quote is an excellent summary of the
point I am trying to make with this entry, "when your evaluation of self
changes, when you feel differently about yourself, everything
about you changes: your thoughts, feelings, emotions - every
There's nothing wrong with evaluating your life critically, so that
you can improve it. Simply put: You must be the kind of person
your spouse and family think you are.* An excellent way to safely
and productively make this evaluation is to write a personal
I love that a client of mine jumped right on this effort, without any
prodding from me. I loved it! This has emboldened me to be a bit
more vocal and extend an invitation to my readers and other
clients to do the same.
So my next blog entry will be an outline to empower you to begin this type of evaluation. In the meantime, be thinking about your why. Start that dialogue with yourself and see what you come up with. Another thing to keep in mind is the manifesto may not be perfect out of the box. It might actually take time to understand your why; after you understand it, it may even evolve as you meet goals. I know that my why, in a variety of themes of my life, have changed with the birth of my son. However, the core desires and importance of what I was doing remains the same, just reorganized and fueled by a different motivation. *A statement I heard on KLOVE radio one day during my commute.