Well it just sucks that you can't control everything that happens! You can't control other peoples responses or the decisions they make anymore than you can pray away another person's free agency or develop superhuman powers.
I can't tell you how many times over the last few years that I have learned to cope by simply saying "sucks to be me" or "sucks to be you" in lieu of a total breakdown or saying "get over it".
Simply put, oftentimes it is what it is and half of the discomfort we face is the amount of energy we put into fighting something that just is or has already happened. It's done and you can't change it. However, you can change the way you look at it.
You can change your perspective of what you can do now, regardless of what just happened. Meaning we now have to be determined to accept the situation or event in order to move beyond it.
- Christopher Reeve broke his neck, lived as a broken-bodied man for several years and later died - sucked to be him! Yet, he still managed to change the lives of many and create a legacy of ability for the disabled. I'd say he successfully moved beyond his circumstance.
- I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis... sucks to be me! Now what? What abilities do I have to work with and how can I use them to move beyond my current circumstance?
- A friend lost his job. Sucks to be him! Now what? What can he learn from the situation and find a new job?
- A friend broke her wrist in play, which interrupted her desired workout schedule. Sucks to be her! But guess what she discovered? Not all is lost, she can still exercise effectively, just modified for a time.
- My husband and I are suffering from sleep deprivation with our newborn. Sucks to be us! But this won't always be the case. What can we do now, to cope and get through this time?
I could go on with that list, but the point I'm getting at is - it's done and we have options on how to move forward. These things have happened or are happening. There may not always be a pleasant way out, but there is always a way through (loosely quoting Robert Frost here). What will you chose to do in order to get through?
My question to you is, do you embrace the fact that issues have been or are present, in order to move beyond them (in a healthy and positive way), or do you wallow in a state of never ending stasis; never getting over it enough to continue living? It all sucks! But you absolutely have a choice in how you respond to what's happening in your life.
Gandhi really had it right when he said, "You must be the change you wish to see..." You don't like it? Change the way you think about it and move on in your best, most positive way, regardless of anyone or anything else.
You will be a much happier person if you learn to surrender or discard that resentment, frustration and anger. Life is good, regardless of any bad that creeps in. One bad doesn't ruin all good. The good, most of the time, does outweigh the bad.
Gandhi really had it right when he said, "You must be the change you wish to see..." You don't like it? Change the way you think about it and move on in your best, most positive way, regardless of anyone or anything else.
You will be a much happier person if you learn to surrender or discard that resentment, frustration and anger. Life is good, regardless of any bad that creeps in. One bad doesn't ruin all good. The good, most of the time, does outweigh the bad.
Here's a public challenge to be determined to see the good, so that you can recognize it more often. It can be done.
Thanks Diana!
ReplyDeleteAll very true. We are going through a very tumultuous time with our newborn in addition to the 8 million other things going on in our lives and it's easy to not see the forest for the trees. It's easier to wallow in self pity and agonize over trivial things than to accept and find a positive way to look at a situation.